WCW: Glamazon Tyomi - Womens Month Edition
Every year I highlight women in history or the known movers and shakers in the entertainment and business industry but I wanted to do something a little different this month.
I am all about owning who I am and I want other women to own who they are. If you are fierce, then be that, if you are open about your sexuality, then be that, but I want every woman to genuinely feel free to be them. I don’t think it’s cool to do things just because you think its trendy or because everyone else is doing it, but because that is what you truly want. So if you aren’t sexually liberated or believe certain things, don’t pretend to be and don’t do them!
However, I do feel a lot of women are sexually repressed and afraid of expressing their sexuality. I also feel like a lot of women just don’t know what women have historically gone through for us to have control and rights over our body. Think about women that have championed and ushered in Women’s Rights and promoted birth control and organizations that promote women rights when lawmakers were against it. There are women in history that have fought for women to educate themselves about sex and their bodies. And lets not forget Emma Goldman, she was one of the first ever to champion both womens rights and gay rights. She is even quoted as saying,
“I demand the independence of woman, her right to support herself; to live for herself’ to love whomever she please, or as many as she pleases, I demand freedom for both sexes, freedom action, freedom in love and freedom in motherhood.”
Emma Goldman wanted women to live, love and dance as freely as they wanted… But even Emma Goldman and others aren’t with us today, there are still women that are still pushing for and supporting their same beliefs. The belief that a woman should have control over her body, and, that a woman shouldn’t feel ashamed of her body.
With that being said, that leads me to introduce my Women Crush Wednesday for this week, Glamazon Tyomi.
You may have seen her YouTube videos teaching you how to ride or have gotten a sex question asked through one of her Q&A’s or maybe you’ve never heard of her but NEED to know of her…. Let’s get right into the interview
Who is She:
International Pleasure Coach and Certified Sexologist
Tyomi Morgan-Najieb aka Glamazon Tyomi, International Pleasure Coach and Certified Sexologist
Tahiry Online (T.O): I’m so excited to interview you! So many know you form YouTube, but please itntorduce yourself to those that are not familiar with Glamazon Tyomi the Sexpert.
Tyomi: My Name is Tyomi Morgan-Najieb, and I have been a Sexual Health Content creator and Pleasure Coach for 7 years. I began my Sex education blog Glamerotica101.com and its Youtube Channel in 2011, and I've helped millions of women and men shape up their sex lives ever since. I am known for my down-to-earth style of teaching that allows people to feel comfortable and connected with me and sexual information. I enjoy coaching in group sessions and one-on-one appointments with clients who want to dig deeper with me. I'm most known for my sex position tutorials, female empowerment and teaching women how to feel confident when they are on top. I tour the world Internationally teaching on a variety of topics for both women and men, and I host erotic events to allow adults to interact with various form of sexual expression in a safe container. I am very proud to be a Certified Sexologist with a certification in Authentic Tantra and I enjoy being a guest on podcasts to talk about sex whenever I can. My goal is to normalize sex talk and help everyone become liberated. I am also a minister and run a Church of Love with my Husband Minister Na'Im Najieb. You can find out more about our interactive online spiritual community at RealLoveChurch.org.
T.O.: In your work as a sexpert, you’ve worked with many, many, women form all types of backgrounds and ages. What is one common issue that women come to you about, and how have you helped them to over come it?
Tyomi: One of the most common issues women come to me with is not knowing if or when they are having a vaginal orgasm, and of course how to ride properly when they are on top. To help remedy women's issues with riding, I created a PROVEN workout that has helped thousands of women around the world improve their stroke. I've had amazing testimonials from women who orgasmed for the first time when on top, and those who became pregnant because their techniques improved so well! I host workout classes in person as well as digitally online, and I am developing a professionally produced workout DVD that will be launched on Amazon Summer 2019. For women who want to learn how to orgasm vaginally, there are a number of techniques that I teach including lineage based tantra practices that train women how to pleasure themselves in a new way to focus on pleasure and not an outcome. There is a lot of education about the body, reprogramming and tool building that has to happen to move women from anorgasmia to orgasmic vaginally. The women who I have coached through anorgasmia have given me glowing reports about how they are able to connect with their yoni more closely and experience deeper, more enriched orgasms. The main thing women need is the willingness to do the work in order to see results.
T.O.: A few years ago, you gained a lot of popularity from your tutorial videos, teaching women various sexual positions that so many women struggle with, what gave you the idea to do so?
Tyomi: What gave me the idea to teach couples sex positions was the fact that no one was doing it, especially a black woman. I didn't see anyone explaining visually how to get into positions and explaining how the positions work. So I decided to be the representation and it took off. For the past 4 years I haven't produced any of that content because of Youtube's terms of service shifting and because of my focus in writing and traveling to teach. I've build a great community on Youtube and I will be producing more content this year and beyond to keep the community updated and in the new about how to keep things spicy.
T.O.: One of your most popular videos on YouTube is your 'How To Ride' video. For a lot of women, not only does a lack of confidence hold them back, but they feel that their weight holds them back from trying this position. What advice would you give them?
Tyomi: The advice that I would give women who think they are too big to be on top is to get in shape by taking my class. Core, lower body and upper body strength are needed to get into the proper position to ride. Stamina is also necessary. I teach several movements within my workout that will help any woman no matter her size or age to improve her stroke. Any woman, no matter her size, can get on top and ride in confidence if that's what she wants to do and if her partner is ready for that experience. All that is needed is the strength to leverage your weight to hover over your partner instead of sitting all of your weight on him. Women have to first get over this idea that there is an ideal size or look when it comes to sexuality. There isn't. Once you can drop this idea, then everything is possible. My How to Ride workout has been featured on Xonecole.com and WeTV's "Love After Lockup."
T.O.: You have an amazing feature that you did for the Washington Post where you spoke about finding your inner vixen. In that interview you spoke about how your childhood unintentionally made you feel less confident, what can you suggest to women still suffering from negative programming and feeling ugly?
Tyomi: Women who can afford therapy or coaching should most definitely seek out professional help to assist them with moving on from these negative perceptions of themselves. And also dropping the idea that you are a body is helpful. You are spirit having a human experience through your body. Your beauty is beyond the physical form that you've chosen for this lifetime. It's your soul that matters most, and beauty comes from the inside out. The physical aesthetics that we associate with beauty can be bought or acquired, but if you do not enjoy who you are as a spirit no amount of makeup, clothing or surgery will fix that. Drop societal standards of beauty and define them for yourself. And again, if you need help please reach out to a professional.
T.O.: Women often time struggle with feeling sexy or feeling confident in the bedroom, what tips could you give them to build their confidence?
Tyomi: Release the previous programming you've encountered about femininity and what "sexy" is supposed to look like. Your thoughts about what is sexy have been polluted by your parents, peers, pornography, pastors and popes, pop culture, publication and personal experiences. Once you can get rid of all of the negative programming you've received, you can determine what you truly think it means to be sexy without the outside influences.
Define for yourself what you feel is sexy (colors, clothing, words, acts, foods, personality traits). Then write those definitions down inside of a journal that you dedicate to your sex life.
Remember that you are in control of your sexuality and your pleasure is your responsibility. If you don't advocate for what you desire and deserve, no one else will.
Sex is fun when it's done within consent and full conscious awareness. Feel free to fantasize and to write your fantasies down. Write about the experiences you want to have with yourself or with others sexually. Sex in itself is a form that can carry either love or fear. Release fear from your perception of sex and connect with how Love can be extended and experienced through sex. Sex in itself doesn't mean anything. You give it all the meaning it has.
Building confidence requires PRACTICE. You must be willing to practice speaking up for what you want and allowing yourself to have sexual experiences such as attending events or hiring a coach.
T.O: A problem that I have encountered over the years is judgement. Women often times judge other women that they feel come off too sexy. They automatically assume that women that dress sexy or take certain pictures are automatically 'hoes' and are 'less than'. What do you say to that?
Tyomi: Women who shame do so because of the programming they've received through pop culture, religious practice, pornography and patriarchy. Women have been programmed to believe that there is some sort of hierarchy that places women who are sexually free lower on the totem pole than those who are virginal, chaste and sexually inexperienced. All women have sexual autonomy, and there are many that don't realize it because they are so clouded by patriarchal programming.
T.O.: In line with the previous question, a lot of women are shamed to talk about what they really like, or even personally acknowledge or allow themselves to try things that they see or have thought about, how can women begin to own their sexuality, without feeling shamed?
Tyomi: Women have to first identify the thoughts, feelings, opinions and experiences that have led them to feeling ashamed of their sexuality and face them. Facing our inner fears pacifies them instead of empowering them. When facing these inner fears, it is important to remember that the process won't feel good, but these fears are not a part of you. They are simply experiences that you have chosen to identify with, and they don't serve you well. Release the attachment to these fearful identities by recognizing your true feelings about sexuality. Choosing for freedom is choosing for your true feelings, and knowing that there isn't anything wrong with exploring your sexuality will shift everything.
T.O.: What can women start doing TODAY to make them feel more empowered in the bedroom?
Tyomi: Women can begin to feel more empowered in the bedroom by 1. being sure about what they want and deserve sexually and 2. speaking up and communicating with their partners about what they want to try and explore. Being empowered means knowing that you have the power to create the experiences you want. I know it can be difficult for some women to know exactly what they want sexually especially if they haven't had great experiences in the past, and this is where working with a professional educator or sex coach can help. GET EDUCATED! That's the best piece of advice I have give to all of the women reading my words.
Follow Tyomi on Instagram, Twitter, YouTube and visit her website for more!!!